I dislike what I’ve heard about Twilight

I can’t say that I dislike the actual book or movie, because I haven’t read/seen it. I can say, however, that what I’ve heard makes me want to weep SPARKLY TEARS OF DESPAIR.

Anyway, I found this hilarious. If you want to read teen romance with superantural crap in it, read Annette Curtis Klause’s stuff, as the female characters actually have, you know, character.

I leave you with this gem from cracked.com:

ROBERT PATTINSON

So, the next generation of young women are currently flocking to see a female lead starring in a movie by a female director based on a bestselling book by a female author, and in this movie the main character wants to become completely submissive and self-sacrificing for a male.

KRISTEN STEWART

I love you. Put a baby in me.

ROBERT PATTINSON

At least the other three books can’t possibly be more misogynistic and depressing.

They ARE.

END

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3 Comments

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3 responses to “I dislike what I’ve heard about Twilight

  1. One of the guys that took his daughter to the movie said he could hear around 40% of the female audience audibly hit puberty when the vampire fella came on-screen. Narf.

  2. Matthew

    ROFL! Heck with the movie, this is the script I want so see filmed!

    I lived this quote:

    KRISTEN STEWART

    You really are a vampire! Does that mean that garlic, stakes, and sunlight kill you?

    ROBERT PATTINSON

    Don’t be stupid. All of that lore is far too interesting for this movie. Being a vampire just means I get superpowers. It’s like being Spider-Man, but sexier. Also, I sparkle in the sunlight.

  3. Matthew

    Ahem: *loved* this quote.

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